30 Oct

Have fun with your growth periods

We all get those times in our lives, when nothing makes sense and it may be hard to sit down, relax and to just take it easy. You may be handling some discomfort or releasing some old pain. It’s totally okay to not have a clue where you are heading with all this.

Your body may be changing, your world views may be changing, your energy may be changing. You may recently have thrown out a whole bunch of old pictures about yourself or the world that you live in and got into the process of integrating a whole new you. This takes a lot of energy and patience from both yourself as well as those around you and there is no hurry through it.

A growth period is when you as a spiritual being are changing and it’s not always a very comfortable space to be in.

Whatever kind of growth period you may be into right now, please be very gentle with yourself. There is no perfect way to grow, no rules or regulations. You are doing the very best you can already. Indeed, you are pure love at your core.

So, on a more practical level, how do you handle these periods? Everyone sure has their own ways, but the best tool for handling growth periods with grace is meditation. Meditation makes it possible to instantly regain your space and your composure. When you sit in a grounded meditation space with awareness resting in the middle of your head – you reclaim your space. You take back your space to just be, to breathe and to have no rules.

I often talk about grounded meditation in this blog simply because it is such a wonderful and powerful tool for healing yourself and subsequently also for healing those around you.

With meditation you go from pushing and fretting your way through a growth period to gracefully gliding through it. Imagine yourself on a surfboard masterfully riding that huge wave of growth. Yes, you can have fun with it!

When you go into your meditation space you can come to awareness of the energies you have been carrying around with you. Instead of being at the effect of the energies in your space and letting them dictate to you how to live your life, you can be the one to choose what you want to keep here and what you want to let go. You can easily release pain, effort, resistance, heaviness, self-doubt, invalidation and all that is weighing you down. You can be your own boss and give your day a colour you like. Again, you are free to make it fun!

With daily meditation as your ally you can be in a growth period and still have fun and play like a child. When you get your breathing space back, you will know and experience in a very visceral way that no matter what, all is well.

© Copyright Hello EssenceJoy 2016

Photo: ‘A child’s play’ / unsplash.com

28 Oct

Grounding helps to make you real

As an intuitive energy reader and a healer I always work from a grounded space. Before I learned to ground myself I felt that something was missing. It was hard for me to be myself around others, to assert myself and to have my own space.

You ground yourself and all of your own information by connecting the base of your spine to the centre of the planet. Your own information is your spirit, your unique energy, and grounding is what helps to bring all of you back into your body. Without grounding you’d simply be floating around somewhere. A phrase comes to mind here for lack of grounding: “the lights are on, but no one’s home.”

Indeed, it was when I began practising grounding that I was finally able to lower my vibration enough to start taking real action steps towards my dreams, goals and life purpose. Without grounding it was nice to float around and explore the ethers, but it was also very hard to realise myself in the right here and now. So, when I was done with exploring and ready to get real, the Universe sent me teachers who taught me how to ground myself.

Giving myself a grounding cord in my early twenties was one of the most beautiful healing gifts I could have ever given to myself. I never felt more fulfilled until I started grounding myself and things only got better and better from there on. Grounding allowed me to release any old and excess pain energy that I’d been carrying around for everyone around me and I finally discovered who I was underneath all of that old energy. I discovered I could actually have my own space for myself. Knowing myself and getting clear on who I was, I was finally also able to become more assertive and self-assured.

Grounding allowed me to take back my space and to become more assertive.

Besides grounding myself I also began grounding everything else: my home, my town, my computer, my food, my dreams and much more. Doing so created many healings. Giving my dreams a grounding cord allowed for the vibration of the dream to manifest in the here and now much faster than it would have done without grounding. I also began healing stressful situations very quickly by grounding them.

On my recent trip to India I was on a flight from Trivandrum to Delhi and sat next to a traditional healer from a Southern Indian state. We spoke about many things and I introduced the grounding technique to him. He expressed his belief that grounding yourself you could become too materialistic and out of touch with your heart. This seems to be the prevailing belief out there and is actually not true since when you ground yourself you simply ground your own information. With grounding you can realise who you already are. And from that space of being real many wonderful healings and miracles happen. By grounding yourself you take full ownership of who you are and are then able to learn and grow much much more than you would be if you were aimlessly floating around in the ethers.

Grounding is what validates who you are as a spiritual being and helps to make you real here in the physical body.

Another thing this Indian healer and many old school practitioners share in common is that they often use a lot of external tools such as feathers, crystals, oracle cards, pendulums, oils, candles, incense and what not. At the Hello EssenceJoy Healing Centre we do not use external tools. Instead, we work from a centered and meditative space and only practice visual tools. We validate our own truth. Grounding and self-validation are essential to the intuitive path, because they allow you to feel safe enough in your body to have your abilities on turned on. With your abilities safely turned on you no longer need external tools since you have what you need already available to you within you.

© Copyright Hello EssenceJoy 2016

Photo: ‘Golden field’ / Unsplash.com

27 Sep

Where are you heading?

Who wrote the script to your life? Are you the one consciously choosing how to live your life and where you are heading by consciously changing the script every day or are you following someone else’s story? Are you consciously choosing where you want to go next or are you running on autopilot?

We are all run by the stories we tell ourselves, the pictures we carry around in our spaces and the programming we have accepted as our truth. Those may be happy and heroic stories or stories of sadness and victimhood. A happy story lives in the present moment while the victim story wants to predict future. If a story doesn’t feel good and doesn’t lead to joy, then it may be time to let go of that story. You have that freedom.

Often when pain comes up, people want a fortune-teller to make predictions about their future and have a guru hand them a clearly defined map for what comes next. The thing is, however, that the future is not predetermined. There is no set destiny that dictates where you are supposed to be heading and what you should be doing. There is no ‘should’ or ‘have to’ – those are simply limitations that come from expectations and demands from others.

You as a spiritual being chose to lower your vibration and to incarnate into this body in this particular time-frame in order to experience certain things here on the physical plane. You have a goal and a purpose for the lifetime. However, there is no set way in which to reach this goal – you get to choose how you want to play. You have an energy that is entirely unique only to you and only you can choose how you want to experience being in a body. Your body is your mock-up and only you have the power to choose where you want to go with it.

We ourselves get to choose what is around the corner for us. We can’t choose for others, but we can choose for ourselves.

Generally, what sets the tone for where you are heading is the energy in your space. It’s the choices you are making right now, the programming from others that you have accepted as truth, the images you visualize daily, the thoughts you think and the words you speak right now. It all really depends on what you bring your attention to, focus on and breath life into and that can all be changed through energywork, meditation and visualization.

The only way to begin to heal the stories that you tell is to step into full ownership of where you are right now. Only from this space of spiritual accountability can you truly begin to see and own what is yours and release what is not yours.

© Copyright Hello EssenceJoy 2016

Photo: ‘Peace of mind’ / Google.com

20 Sep

Speaking your own truth leads you to your joy

When you take the time to connect with your own truth in each moment and then speak your mind gently and with assertiveness you are being loving. Honesty is a deeply loving act. While on the other hand holding back your truth and your honest words is a way of holding back your love both for yourself as well as the others.

Sometimes the truth that needs to be spoken in the moment may not be what those around or even you yourself may want to hear as it may challenge the integrity of everyone, some changes may need to be made, but it will be a tremendous healing for all. Most of all though, truth, when spoken gently with love and assertiveness will really set you free and will be a healing for all.

If you are the type of person that loathes conflict and wants to hide his head in the sand at the first sign of trouble then it may be hard for you to stand up for yourself, speak your mind and consequently say no to others. You may be into the pattern of pleasing others and always saying what they want to hear in fear of disapproval. If so, then you are drowning out the voice of your intuition and inner knowing over the noise of other people’s expectations and demands. This is soul-destroying and invalidating for your spirit and probably also very painful for you.

This kind of distance between the real you and the you that you are in the world is rooted in some sort of a childhood trauma where you were programmed by those around you to think and believe that you didn’t matter, that you were small and undeserving of love. So because of these beliefs it can be hard for you to truly be yourself and to receive the love that you so desperately need, because you believe that you don’t really deserve it. Now is time to kick out those faulty old beliefs and claim your true worth as the son or daughter of the Creator for whom nothing is impossible. God is pure compassion and has created plenty of love and resources for all so that no one’s needs ever really go without fulfilment.

Sometimes speaking your truth can be intimidating, but it is necessary for clarity, direction and healing for all. Realise that you may be holding back tremendous soul wisdom that wants to express through you by not sharing your words. You can rest assured that if you keep holding back your words and your authenticity situations will keep presenting themselves that will keep pushing your ability to speak up and express yourself in the moment.

If you feel a sense of tightness or anxiety on your neck it means there are words that need to be expressed but you’ve held them back for one reason or another. Often the reason is fearing disapproval and being rejected and abandoned by others that don’t want to hear the truth. The truth is however if those around will abandon you for speaking up then those may not be the people you want to be hanging around with anyways. It’s a win-win for all. Most importantly, at least speak that truth to yourself first, then it will be easier to express yourself to others.

If your intention is to be loving and kind and you come from that place within you when you speak, then you will naturally start to repel those with unloving focuses and intentions. It’s not something you did wrong it’s just that the Universe is ordering events and people around you to suit your true self and your true needs in order to bring you your highest fulfilment and joy. It all starts with clarifying your intentions for yourself and then expressing that either in conversation with your guardian angels, your guides or the Supreme Being. Rest assured that you are being heard and infinitely loved at all times.

© Copyright Hello EssenceJoy 2016

Photo: ‘Bamboo forest’ / Unsplash.com

9 Sep

Becoming the total embodiment of your true self

Today may seem like any other day, but in reality it is a very special day indeed. Numerologically speaking today’s date carries with it the 9/9/9 vibration and holds within it immense power for healing, closure and manifestation.

This whole year of 2016 I’ve been watching with curiosity, wonder and amazement how the current year number 9 has been playing itself out. The 999 sequence has literally popped up everywhere and carries with it a lot of meaning. You can easily find out the meaning of the triple 9 by googling it, but I would encourage you to notice what this number sequence means for you personally – you can do that by just paying attention to what the events, situations, lessons and blessings are for you right now.

The number 9 is generally known to represent the Universal spiritual laws, a higher perspective, influence, non-conformity, leading life as a positive example for others, altruism, humanitarianism, philanthropy, healing, teaching, guidance, closure and endings.

Having an abundance of 9 energy in one date signifies the meaning of the number 9 being magnified, which means that it is especially important to pay attention to its meaning. Looking closely, this is truly a time of endings, of doing kind deeds for the humanity as a whole and getting down to business as far as true life purpose is concerned. It’s a good time to take a look at what you are done with and where you want to go next. Of course it can also mean completions in a karmic sense so it’s not always an easy ride – it depends on where you have been! If there is something karmic for you to look at then you may be triggered today. And that is a good thing.

In fact, the whole year of 2016 has been building up to these three dates: September 9, 18 and 27. They all hold the 9/9/9 vibration. If you look closely at the events throughout this year you can see clearly that indeed some sort of collective karmic themes have been explored. Regardless of the drama that has ensued, the most important thing is that people are awakening to their true life purpose.

From a higher perspective the 9/9/9 date signifies the fulfillment of the masculine and the feminine – the union of shiva and shakti as they are known in Hinduism. It’s a good time to take a close look at how you embody both the feminine and the masculine qualities within yourself and where you could possibly embrace more of either one or the other thus becoming more complete and whole within yourself.

Something to be aware of is that the dark masculine can be a fearsome, destructive and bloodthirsty warrior while the dark feminine can be an evil witch. We all carry the elements of both within ourselves. If you don’t accept, love and own the uncomfortable stuff it will simply get pushed into the unconscious and continue to seek expression in an unconscious way, which means it will then simply control your life from behind the scenes. By having something come up for you you will be in a position to examine it in the light of day rather than have it continue controlling your life from the unconscious.

As you own your power, sit in ownership of your true self and speak your truth, the relationships around you will inevitably change. Here’s something to bare in mind: you deserve love and respect and it’s absolutely safe to let go of relationships that do not honor and respect who you really are. If someone rejects you for who you are when you are coming from a pure and authentic place within yourself then they are in fact rejecting themselves. Leave them with their own processes, you can’t change other people’s reactions or choices. It is for them to live with. Be complete within yourself and take good care of yourself by choosing relationships and friendships that honor you. This is to say: trust the wise intuitive counsel of your body.

As a sensitive and aware being you might have been teased from an early age about your sensitivity or bullied or intimidated because you were somehow different. You might still be carrying these wounds around with you in your energy field or these old pictures that say you are somehow not good enough or somehow lacking something. It is loving toward yourself to avoid harsh relationships or situations and to steer toward simplicity. You may need lots of time today to go within and to just be with yourself and to avoid harsh situation. Enjoy and cherish your alone time.

The truth is that you have your own unique inadequacies or shortcomings and those are there for a reason. You came into this lifetime with a set of characteristics and your essence set up those to create conditions for something specific that it wanted to experience. For example, disability might mean less mobility, but it could also open up possibility for you to learn to ask for help rather than attempting to do everything by yourself. A very important theme to look at today is that of letting go of any and all judgements towards yourself.

So today situations may be coming up that may be encouraging you to stand up for yourself and walk in your truth. Maybe you are being pushed energetically and tested for how well you are established in your centre. Maybe you are tested for your ability to soften and be kind. The tendencies are all up now and up for review so you can take a really good look at where you can still grow and expand. Enjoy!

Some of the points to consider today:

  1. What/who am I done with and ready to let go of?
  2. What do I need to integrate more of: masculine or feminine?
  3. Can I speak my truth without holding back?
  4. Can I be fully present and authentic with the people in my life?
  5. Am I living my own dream or someone else’s?
  6. Do I trust myself?
  7. Am I being loving and kind towards myself?
  8. Can I embrace my shadow without trying to fix it?
  9. Am I being on my path?

© Copyright Hello EssenceJoy 2016

Photo: ‘Green tropical woods’

14 Jul

Healing from the inside out

When you comes across pain in others either on a global scale or on a personal level, you get lit up. It is perfectly natural and it is an opportunity for you to learn something new about yourself.

The immediate knee-jerk response tends to be to want to heal, help and give advice or otherwise influence the event that you have absolutely no control over. When you are in that ‘knee-jerk response’ space you can be sure that you are matching to the drama you witnessed. Other people’s pain is very real and you need tools and awareness to sort out what belongs to you and what doesn’t.

The thing is, if you really want to help ‘heal the world’, please be aware that ‘the world’ is you. Your perceptions of the outside world and what you experience as upsetting events outside of you are reflective of something going on within you. The outer world is a mirror of the inner you. Begin healing the world by healing yourself first.

The keyword here is ‘control’. As a spiritual being in a physical body, you only ever really get to have control over your own thoughts, emotions, reactions, behaviour and energy. In other words, you only have control over your own space. You can inspire change and healing in others, but that cannot be achieved through fighting or resisting others and what they are putting out there. You only create change by being the change you want to see.

The first real step towards healing is to create space to take a good close look at what comes up for you. Try not to talk or communicate excessively when lit up as you will simply be reinforcing the pain. This is the problem the planet is facing currently – too many people communicating from a growth space instead of waiting for clarity. Have a look if what is coming up is new or some old programming. What you are experiencing isn’t something to figure out, but simply to be aware of. Once you have an awareness of what has come up for you you will be in a position to ‘work it’. Your awareness of and presence with the pain that you experience is what begins to transform it.

The truth is that you are psychic and can act on what you see, feel, experience. There are many tools that can be used. For example, visually grounding your body into the centre of the planet from the base of your spine is an immediate healing. You may want to try grounding in a meditation to give yourself some space to release any excess energy that you may have picked up and create some space for your own energy and needs. There are many other wonderful tools that you can learn in the meditation class.

Then, when you approach ‘the world’ in this way your words and actions will be guided from a clear and healed space. You will be a much-needed healing to others without as much as lifting a finger. You vibrationally set the example. No struggle or effort required.

“Go back and take care of yourself. Your body needs you. Your feelings need you. Your perceptions need you. Your suffering needs you to acknowledge it. Go home and be there for all these things.” ~Thich Nhat Hanh

© Copyright Hello EssenceJoy 2016

Photo: ‘Green forest’ / unsplash.com

28 May

Worry is a misuse of imagination

When you are in a tender growth period, stretching yourself in some way or moving through a transition space it can be easy for worry to come up. Understandably so, you may be concerned for your very survival.

By default, we all worry about everything: our health, finances, relationships, family, friends, work, our image and so forth. There always seems to be something more to worry and to feel anxious about. However, if you just can’t seem to let yourself relax and let go, you may have taken on a bunch of energy that is not yours. When energy gets in your space that is not yours, it does not fit in and simply gets stuck. In fact, if you don’t regularly release it through grounding or some other form of energy release, it can eventually cause some form of imbalance.

From a holistic point of view excess worry can be a result of the wrong lifestyle. Your body may be processing too much energy from either processed sugar, coffee, tea, wheat or other food that is aggravating your body and your nervous system. Also an unsuitable sleep-cycle or lack of sleep and overworking can cause worry. You begin by releasing any energy from your space that is not yours and then your body will release that energy in the form of bad habits. It takes quite a bit of commitment and consciousness to do this work.

From a purely clairvoyant point of view, worry is actually a negative prayer. What you worry about you draw to yourself and unconsciously manifest because you are investing your precious energy to it. The more you invest your energy and attention into something, the more real your source of worries becomes. Worrying itself does not actually solve any problems. Trusting and visualization do. By using your spiritual tools such as visualization, faith and trust you can consciously manifest what you actually want for yourself.

The vulnerable truth is that underneath worry is unhealed pain, an old traumatic experience. There may be very old stories of unworthiness, helplessness, rejection or abuse. To heal worry, it is necessary to connect with your pain and to release it. The source of all healing is love.

Worry comes in when we lose touch with the peaceful and loving ground of our being, the essence. Essence does not worry, feel fear or anxiety, because it knows it is infinite, that it has all the time in the world and that it can accomplish everything. Essence only experiences love. On the ground of your being you know you are already whole and need absolutely nothing from no one, because you are already whole. There is immense joy and fulfillment that comes from connecting with this inner wholeness. And there is truly nothing that can stand in the way of someone who is vibrating from such pure joy.

Worrying doesn’t solve tomorrow’s troubles. It empties today of its joys.

Worry can really be like an addiction. It can be hard to let go of and it appears to be justified. Truth is it isn’t justified. You can let it go. You can let grace deliver to you what you need in divine timing.

Instead of worrying, do what you need to do to relax, visualize what you want to manifest and trust … There are many ways you can relax: read a book, take a hot bath with relaxing bath salts and oils, meditate, imagine already having what you want, take time out, put on your favorite music, be silly and playful, create something beautiful and much more.

Join our meditation class to learn the energy work tool of grounding. Grounding is an essential tool for empaths, psychics and intuitives who are more sensitive to the energies at large than most people. Using grounding you can safely release any energy that is not yours and feel safe enough to visualize the kind of life you want again.

© Copyright Hello EssenceJoy 2016

Photo: ‘Worry is a misuse of imagination’ / Google

19 May

What happens when you match to the vibration of love?

Our planet is going through a big transformation right now. We are all feeling the growth pains. There are big fear vibes floating through the collective consciousness and many are finally beginning to awaken to who they really are.

The large scale global political and economic changes that are happening have kicked up some pretty heavy collective fears. People are waking up and are having to take responsibility for the direction that their lives are heading in rather than waiting for someone else to come and make all the decisions for them. The chance of history repeating itself in the form of dictatorship looks pretty real. Fortunately, no one actually wants that, so this can be avoided.

The awakening that is happening en-masse is in need of equally powerful large scale spiritual leadership. According to a channeled source, the Supreme Being is making preparations for manifesting towards the end of this year to help transform those collective fears and to guide us all back to our true nature, which is love. Supreme Being manifestations have been truly Earth-shattering in their influence in the past and have all created tremendous change for mankind. Think, for example, of the life of Jesus Christ. However, if we all do our ‘homework’ this manifestation will not be necessary.

Humankind is currently undergoing a soul age shift from a young soul perspective to a mature soul perspective. The young soul perspective represents competition, being the king of the mountain and one person winning while another one loses. It represents lack consciousness. Think of the current economic imbalance of the extremely wealthy 1% versus the poor 99% in the United States. The mature soul perspective is concerned with community and helping each other, which allows for everyone to win. The majority of those currently alive on the planet are young souls who are transitioning into a mature soul perspective. And they need a lot of help from those of us who are spiritually older and more experienced.

This is where we, the older souls, come in and can do our bit. Instead of matching to the collective consciousness and falling into fear and worry with everyone else we will need to do all we can to remain our purest expression of love. There are wonderful self-care tools we can all practice daily such as grounding, running energy, creating and destroying roses and so forth. These tools can help to keep our auras clear and helps to get some space from other people’s stuff.

For those of us who are intuitive and empathic, the global upheavals are truly windows of opportunity to deepen our self-care practices. Taking good care of our own energy and spaces doesn’t mean we are turning away from those who need help. It means we are helping others by being our own best selves and taking excellent care of ourselves. And then giving of ourselves from a clear, pure and healed place.

When faced with someone who has lost touch with their true selves and is acting out of ego, the best way to help them is not to fulfil their every egotistic demand, but just to send them an energetic ‘hello, I love you’. And watch the healing that happens. You don’t have to carry on a relationship or communication with someone that is unkind or disrespectful to you, but just sending them an ‘I love you’ message on a spiritual level is all the healing that is required. Practising this simple, but powerful technique you are holding space for love to happen and to grow. You can do this by merely visualizing the person and sending the message as a thought.

Don’t take anything personally. People are going through growth periods and processing. Just send them love.

You have a choice whether to carry the energy of love or fear / hate around with you. Love energy brings health and well-being while fear brings disease. Love allows you to feel validated and at ease, while fear causes tension and imbalance. Our bodies are very sensitive to the energies of these extremes of energy, so we must consciously choose what we feed into them on a daily basis.

If you are feeling a little out of tune an intuitive healing may be just the tune up you need. It puts you back in touch with your own answers and your natural flow of healing energy. A healing might not necessarily give you all the intellectual answers, but it guides you back to the true source of your own answers and healing energy, which are already within you.

© Copyright Hello EssenceJoy 2016

Photo: ‘Meditation’ / unsplash.com

9 May

Where do you find support?

Before a seed can become a flower it needs to be carefully sowed into fertile soil at the appropriate time. It then requires the gardener’s constant loving attention and care to be nurtured to its fullness, maturation and eventually flowering.

Through its growth cycle from a humble seed to a beautiful, magnificent flower, a plant has a lot of challenges to face: weather conditions, pests, birds and animals. Without the gardener’s proper care, attention and presence the flower would have difficulty in becoming all that it can be – it could not attain its optimal potential.

In the same way we are all like these flowers and we all need support and nurturing both from the Earth below our feet, the nature around us, natural seasonal cycles, from our own conscious actions as well as from those around us to become all that we can be. We are all in this life thing together and it is only through supporting each other that we can all blossom.

So where do you find support when dealing with a challenge or perhaps when your shadow has come up for review? You probably have many more sources of support than you may even be aware of. Take a moment to become aware of what supports you and be in gratitude for those. When you send your gratitude to what supports you, that support can then grow and the Universe will send you more of it.

Sometimes the support we need may not be showing up in the way that we would like. Indeed, sometimes the egos of those around us can confuse us about what is really true. We can temporarily lose touch with our true, spiritual nature and forget we are all love at the core. When outer support isn’t forthcoming, we mustn’t sit with our hands on our lap, wait for others to change first and for others to come and support us. We must always look at all the ways that we can support ourselves. Support from others has to come by God’s grace not by the demand of our egos.

The way God works might not always make sense to the human mind, the personality, but in the end the realizations and abundance are bountiful. Whatever happens, always happens as grace of God. Everything always works out for the best.

There are many ways that you can support yourself and apply the healing balm of self-love to soothe life’s harshness, which allows you to be all that you can be and show up in your fullness:

  • Unconditionally accept everything about yourself. Including the shadow.
  • Approve yourself. Don’t wait for others to come and approve of you. The only person whose approval you’ll ever need is your own.
  • Your daily spiritual practice. This could be practice such as prayer, meditation, walks in nature, yoga, selfless service and much more. Use a daily spiritual practice to keep yourself grounded in love.
  • Self-nurturing practices. Doing nice things for ourselves such as having nurturing salt baths, buying presents for ourselves, treating ourselves to something wonderful every now and then…
  • Connect with the people that nurture you. Maybe all you need is a phone call with a family member just to check in with them. Never underestimate a simple conversation with a friend or a family member. It is never a waste of time.
  • Connect with the Earth below your feet. Honor and love the Earth. Ground yourself into the planet below your feet via a grounding cord from the base of your spine. You can use the grounding technique taught at our healing centre.
  • Grounding allows your body to feel safe and secure and as a result you are able to imagine a bright and joyous future for yourself. Try the meditation class to learn the technique.
  • Your wellness practices such as observing a healthy diet, regular exercise, having massage and many others.

© Copyright Hello EssenceJoy 2016

Photo: ‘Zen’ / unsplash.com

27 Apr

Self-love allows you to show up in your fullness

Sometimes that part of us that we consider dark and unacceptable, aka ‘the shadow’, comes up bringing with it some uncomfortable old emotions or experiences.

‘The shadow’ is really just an umbrella term for everything that is as of yet unknown to us about ourselves on a conscious level. It is ‘the stuff’ we have shoved into the unconscious for processing another time. It is our unconscious beliefs about ourselves and those are what either hold us back from living a life of fullness and beauty or what give us an unknown confidence and courage to reach for the stars.

Within what we call ‘the shadow’ are contained old addictions, tendencies, worries, fears, inadequacies, and so forth, all of which are the product of the experiences we’ve had over many many lifetimes. That stuff can be uncomfortable to be with and the knee-jerk reaction is to try to escape it all through some form of an addiction, which only serves to numb the pain. Healing, however, comes from not attempting to overcome your shortcomings or to seek to ‘improve yourself’, but to completely own and love whatever comes up. There is nothing to improve and everything to own and accept.

Self-love means to lovingly accept everything about yourself and not just the parts that are popular and easy to accept. This also means unconditionally loving your shadow. Apply self-love to yourself like a mother tends to her wounded child with utmost tenderness.

You become a teacher of love by simply loving yourself for all that you are without trying to hide or fix anything about yourself and by showing up authentic.

If you try to hide your shortcomings or to cover them up so as to appear strong and invulnerable to others, you are doing yourself and everyone else a disservice. No one benefits from perfection – there is enough emotional deadness already. Like a desert that is thirsty for rain, the world needs more people who walk in authenticity. Remaining vulnerable, soft and open no matter what is the greatest form of leadership and gift anyone can ever give to the planet right now.

There is a very old lie that both men and women with higher masculine energy carry around, it is the belief that vulnerability and sensitivity is a weakness. However, here’s the catch: it takes vulnerability to live your dreams and to reach fulfilment. It is your vulnerability that inspires others and allows them to feel safe enough to open up, too. It is vulnerability that creates loving communities.

If you were used to being discriminated or grew up in an unloving home you may still be feeling the effects of the abuse and wondering what you did to deserve that. Your inner child may still be carrying wounds. And you might still be looking outside of yourself for approval since none of it was forthcoming during your early years. However, no one else can ever know you in your fullness and approve all of you in the way that you can. The only person whose approval you’ll ever need is your own.

©Copyright Hello EssenceJoy 2016

Photo: Free nature photography / unsplash.com