Sometimes you find yourself on the receiving end of judgement, invalidation or disapproval from others. Maybe it was something you said or did that triggered their insecurities, but it is certainly not something you are responsible for. It is not yours to fix or heal.
These situations are truly blessings in disguise since as a result of this experience you will grow and learn a whole lot more about yourself than you may previously have been aware of. You may notice that the degree to which you react to someone else’s projections directed at you is the degree to which you actually believe what they are saying. Or in others words, it is the degree to which you have lost your space and are matching their insecurities. If you are able to remain neutral here, then congratulations: it means you have cleared your matching pictures. On the other hand, if it seems like you’ve hit a wall, it is because your self-image is in some way hooked into how others see you.
As a result you might even get angry at them, since your expectations about how others should behave and act around you have been disappointed. You lost your space and your amusement. Not an issue in and of itself, but the goal is to return to neutrality and have your space back.
The truth is you cannot control how others see you, receive you or react to you. That is not your space or place to have a say in. Everyone makes their decisions and creates their own karma. It is between them and Source.
The healing step here is to move everybody else’s energy out of your self-image space and define it for yourself with the vibration of self-love instead. Then, no matter how many people are on your side or supportive of you, you can do your own thing, speak your truth, be true to yourself and not give a damn about what others think of you. What others think of you is none of your business anyway.
Self-love, seeing the value and worth in yourself regardless of whether others can see it or not is the mark of a true leader. This kind of leadership may not be about leading the masses, conquering lands or roaring like a lion. Rather, it is about the ability to quietly work on your own even when facing opposition. With self-love you are able to do the right thing even when all odds are stacked against you, because you have your space and freedom to be authentic and are not phased by temporary dramas.
The healing balm of self-love allows you to accept and embrace everything about yourself, not just the good and easy parts. There are parts of your beingness that have been hidden away in the unconscious for a long time. Old fear-based belief systems may have caused you to repress these parts about yourself as dark, evil or wicked. It is only with the nurturing light of self-love that those parts can come out to the surface and finally be seen, healed and owned by you. And as you own more of yourself, including the uncomfortable and the dark parts, you will be able to more easily let go of all those external power struggles, battles and disagreements with others where you felt you had to defend yourself. With your energy freed up from fighting with others, more of it will be available to you and free to use for creating something wonderful in the moment. You step out of competition with Source.
The greatest truth is that truly nothing about what others say or do is ever personal to you, especially when it seems like it is! Rather, everyone are having their own conversations with Source and more often than not, those conversations can happen through you. Validate that you are part of a greater whole that works and creates blessings through you. Your whole beingness in itself is a blessing.
© Copyright Hello EssenceJoy 2018
Photo: ‘Self-love’ / artwork by Tiia Lohmus / From the “Daily Healing Messages from Source” oracle card deck